Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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