You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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