so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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