He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
