im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
two words: eviction party
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
