ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
How does it feel to date your dad?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
soo... how was my night?
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