I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
