Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
