He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
