I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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