so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
