There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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