Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
