This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
