no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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