I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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