Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
