Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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