That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
