There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I am midnight drunk by noon
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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