you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize