PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
