and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
