Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Randomize