It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
