Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Green mimosas i think yes
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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