idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
