Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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