Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize