I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize