What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Found your dick twin last night
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
