i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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