To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
