So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
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