Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
