I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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