My balls are so social today.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
