it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
