Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize