Christians are straight up FREAKS
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
