I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
