I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
