but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Randomize
