Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
