Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
