Me too!
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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