trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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