If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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