This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
