Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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