So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I've blown a few things in my day
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
