so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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